LDR or long distance relationship is inevitable for some of us especially if we are transitioning to college from high school. Some of these relationships work and some do not. However, I truly believe that successful long distance relationship is possible.
Few years ago, I was in a long distance relationship with someone. We were good friends that we ended up talking to each other almost every day. Eventually, it did not work out since he thought he was unworthy of me, and I thought that I do not have a future with him since he was not in school. We were younger then and I was very ambitious.
In 2013, I started dating my current boyfriend Ron. Our relationship was something that shocked everyone we know (including our families!). It was maybe because I am older than him and he has always treated me as a friend and as an older sister (and maybe other reasons?). After I earned my Associate’s degree in the fall of 2013, I decided to work full-time in our community college as an English tutor. Meanwhile, Ron was finishing up his Associate’s. He graduated in December 2014 and then transferred to Texas Tech in January 2015. This is when we began to have this long distance relationship.
“How did you feel? What was it like? ” These are some of the many questions I was asked about my long distance relationship. The night when Ron left, I did not cry at the airport. I cried so hard when I went home! I cried the first month! I missed him so much that it was so hard for me not to see him everyday. It was hard because I was so used to him dropping me off home after work, eating lunch with me, or him coming to my office to bring me some snacks. With him gone, I needed to adjust.
I stayed working for another six months, until my contract expires. I wanted to go to New York to finish my Bachelor’s degree. Ron wanted me to come to Texas Tech with him. Knowing that I am much more independent than he is, I felt that it would be better if I go to New York. There were some other reasons why I wanted to go there than in Texas. However, my love for him is greater than my ambition of studying in New York that I followed him to Texas.
Ron and I did not see each other for 8 months. It was definitely worth the wait and yes, our long distance relationship worked! There are no formulas or tips in making it work. We decided that our priority is our studies and that we’ll Skype or message each other when we are not busy. We talked almost every other day – some days 15 minutes only, some days 2 hours. Communication is definitely important in making our relationship work. Trust, loyalty, understanding, love – these are also important!
Certainly, I have learned a lot while going through this LDR. I learned that it is okay to be away from someone you love because you get to miss them. I learned to appreciate the person I love more. I learned to enjoy my own time that I created great memories with great friends. I learned to enjoy being with other people. I learned to be more understanding of him. Long distance relationship helped the both of us to be more mature in handling our relationship. It may be difficult in the beginning, but long distance relationship is possible.
Featured image: lifehack.org